Dating Jokes

A friend of mine keeps dating lawyers

May 10, 2026 By Tom

A friend of mine keeps dating lawyers.
I said at some point they’d lose their appeal.

My friends started seeing someone called Rosemary

May 27, 2023 By Tom

My friends started seeing someone called Rosemary.

I don’t know what he season her.

I’ve just joined a dating website for Arsonists…They send me new matches

January 14, 2023 By Tom

I’ve just joined a dating website for Arsonists…
They send me new matches every week!

Told my friend I have a crush on Beyonce

January 11, 2020 By Paul

Told my friend I have a crush on Beyonce and he said whatever floats your boat mate….
No I said, thats Buoyancy

Met this girl in a pub. After a while she said “would

November 17, 2019 By Tom

Met this girl in a pub. After a while she said “would you like me to show you a good time?” I couldn’t turn that down so we went outside.

She took off her coat and ran 100 meters in 9.8 seconds.

I once dated a bird who worked at the Stock Exchange

October 18, 2019 By Tom

I once dated a bird who worked at the Stock Exchange.

We played FTSE under the table.

What do you call a couple who love fishing?

July 8, 2017 By Tom

What do you call a couple who love fishing?

My girlfriend and I went on our 9th date to see the

June 16, 2014 By Tom

My girlfriend and I went on our 9th date to see the new Batman film.

Our dates so far can be summarised as follows:

Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, BATMAN!